2004-02-20
As Lynnsey would say...
"hehehehe... so evil!!" *grin*
A friend of mine from school was wondering how to do this quiz I was telling her about (I think it's the Dante's Hell one, or something). In order to do this, I had to give her the link to my blog. SHE HAS NOW BEEN CORRUPTED!! BUAHAHAHAHAHA!! 'Nessa will NEVER be the same. kukukukukukukukukukuku (Sorry, you'd have to be Carla or Tannis or Possibly Lynnsey to get that).
Anyone who bothers to read my blog may have noticed that I wrote a story about my adventures as Smack-upside-the-head woman? Well, I realised that there was a serious flaw to my plans! You see, I plan on smacking a lot of people upside the head. People from Buffy, people from Trigun, people from Anita Blake etc. But the thing is, some of these people are seriously scary and psychocotic (think Knives, people). Plus, some of the non-psychotic ones may want to hit back. Which is not fair.
Why is this not fair, you may ask? Because, I don't hit for violent reasons. I deliver smacks of justice and virtue and plain common sense. Smacks that are both rightly deserved and sorely needed by the smackee. How, then, is it right for the smackees, to whom I am doing an invaluable service, to retaliate? Plus, I can't defend myself for sh*t. Yeah.
No need to worry, fear for my personal safety shall not keep me from handing out my smacks of justice. But first...
back at Cheerios corporate headquarters
Cheerios CEO: La la... let's go check the mail. What the... what in the name of all that is honeyey and nutty is all of this?!?!
Cheerios lackey person: Well, sir, it appears to be a shipment of a million box tops.
Cheerios CEO: What... the "Send away for a superpower" special?!?! I thought we discontinued that after that one freak actually sent us a million box tops.
Cheerios lackey person: Uh... I guess the paperwork to discontinue that special offer never went through.
Cheerios CEO: Well, who the HELL was crazy enough to send us a million box tops this time??
Cheerios lackey person: *looking down at order form* It appears to be from a Theresa Beauchemin.
Cheerios CEO: NOT HER AGAIN!! Dammit! She was the one that sent away for a superpower last time?? What kind of freak would get together two million box tops from Cheerios cereal???
Cheerios lackey person: I don't know sir, but she really scares me.
Cheerios CEO: Well, we simply can't give her another superpower. I already sold my soul to Satan to get her that last one.
Cheerios lackey person: But sir, if we don't give it to her, she could SUE US for an insane amount of money.
Cheerios CEO: *considering* We can't have that, can we? Well, I guess we'll just have to give Satan your soul, lackey.
Cheerios lackey person: *whimpers* okay.
Cheerios CEO: Well, what does that freak want this time?
Cheerios lackey person: Um... *reads order form* it says here she wants superpowers of indivisibility. No... I'm sorry... invincebility. And it's spelled wrong. Oh... and she never wants to see another Cheerio for as long as she lives.
Cheerios CEO: *sigh* Well, it's better than her last request. Being able to transport herself to any place, whether fictional or real, at any time.... pfft!! What a stupid request. Well, I guess we have no choice but to get her invincebility superpowers. But write back telling her... *grinning evilly* that she'll have to send in another million box tops before we grant her second request of never seeing another Cheerio again. *evil laugh... the lackey joins in... CEO stops* Only I may do the evil laugh!!
One day, outside Theresa Beauchemin's luxerious mansion home
Theresa: La dee da dee da... time to get the mail!! What's this... letter from Cheerios!!! SCORE!!
Dear Theresa Beauchemin,
Thank you for sending in one million box tops for our Send away Superpower Special. We reget to inform you that this offer will be discontinued within a month. As we were still holding the offer at the time your letter was received, we will still hold true to our word, despite the fact that it means we had to send one of our number to Hell. Enclosed, you will find your invincebility. We do hope that you enjoy your invincebility. As for your second request, to never see another Cheerio for as long as you live, we regret to inform you that, as this is a seperate request, we cannot honour it without having received an additional million box tops. Thank you very much for supporting Cheerios. Once again, enjoy your superpower.
Sincerely,
Cheerio CEO man.
Theresa: Another million box-tops, eh? Within a month, eh? And they think I can't and/or won't do it!! I laugh at them. LAUGH!! *winks at the camera* Sooooo... next stop... KENSHIN!!! BUAHAHAHAHA!!!
And I'm spent
"In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks."
-Scott Adams
"hehehehe... so evil!!" *grin*
A friend of mine from school was wondering how to do this quiz I was telling her about (I think it's the Dante's Hell one, or something). In order to do this, I had to give her the link to my blog. SHE HAS NOW BEEN CORRUPTED!! BUAHAHAHAHAHA!! 'Nessa will NEVER be the same. kukukukukukukukukukuku (Sorry, you'd have to be Carla or Tannis or Possibly Lynnsey to get that).
Anyone who bothers to read my blog may have noticed that I wrote a story about my adventures as Smack-upside-the-head woman? Well, I realised that there was a serious flaw to my plans! You see, I plan on smacking a lot of people upside the head. People from Buffy, people from Trigun, people from Anita Blake etc. But the thing is, some of these people are seriously scary and psychocotic (think Knives, people). Plus, some of the non-psychotic ones may want to hit back. Which is not fair.
Why is this not fair, you may ask? Because, I don't hit for violent reasons. I deliver smacks of justice and virtue and plain common sense. Smacks that are both rightly deserved and sorely needed by the smackee. How, then, is it right for the smackees, to whom I am doing an invaluable service, to retaliate? Plus, I can't defend myself for sh*t. Yeah.
No need to worry, fear for my personal safety shall not keep me from handing out my smacks of justice. But first...
back at Cheerios corporate headquarters
Cheerios CEO: La la... let's go check the mail. What the... what in the name of all that is honeyey and nutty is all of this?!?!
Cheerios lackey person: Well, sir, it appears to be a shipment of a million box tops.
Cheerios CEO: What... the "Send away for a superpower" special?!?! I thought we discontinued that after that one freak actually sent us a million box tops.
Cheerios lackey person: Uh... I guess the paperwork to discontinue that special offer never went through.
Cheerios CEO: Well, who the HELL was crazy enough to send us a million box tops this time??
Cheerios lackey person: *looking down at order form* It appears to be from a Theresa Beauchemin.
Cheerios CEO: NOT HER AGAIN!! Dammit! She was the one that sent away for a superpower last time?? What kind of freak would get together two million box tops from Cheerios cereal???
Cheerios lackey person: I don't know sir, but she really scares me.
Cheerios CEO: Well, we simply can't give her another superpower. I already sold my soul to Satan to get her that last one.
Cheerios lackey person: But sir, if we don't give it to her, she could SUE US for an insane amount of money.
Cheerios CEO: *considering* We can't have that, can we? Well, I guess we'll just have to give Satan your soul, lackey.
Cheerios lackey person: *whimpers* okay.
Cheerios CEO: Well, what does that freak want this time?
Cheerios lackey person: Um... *reads order form* it says here she wants superpowers of indivisibility. No... I'm sorry... invincebility. And it's spelled wrong. Oh... and she never wants to see another Cheerio for as long as she lives.
Cheerios CEO: *sigh* Well, it's better than her last request. Being able to transport herself to any place, whether fictional or real, at any time.... pfft!! What a stupid request. Well, I guess we have no choice but to get her invincebility superpowers. But write back telling her... *grinning evilly* that she'll have to send in another million box tops before we grant her second request of never seeing another Cheerio again. *evil laugh... the lackey joins in... CEO stops* Only I may do the evil laugh!!
One day, outside Theresa Beauchemin's luxerious mansion home
Theresa: La dee da dee da... time to get the mail!! What's this... letter from Cheerios!!! SCORE!!
Dear Theresa Beauchemin,
Thank you for sending in one million box tops for our Send away Superpower Special. We reget to inform you that this offer will be discontinued within a month. As we were still holding the offer at the time your letter was received, we will still hold true to our word, despite the fact that it means we had to send one of our number to Hell. Enclosed, you will find your invincebility. We do hope that you enjoy your invincebility. As for your second request, to never see another Cheerio for as long as you live, we regret to inform you that, as this is a seperate request, we cannot honour it without having received an additional million box tops. Thank you very much for supporting Cheerios. Once again, enjoy your superpower.
Sincerely,
Cheerio CEO man.
Theresa: Another million box-tops, eh? Within a month, eh? And they think I can't and/or won't do it!! I laugh at them. LAUGH!! *winks at the camera* Sooooo... next stop... KENSHIN!!! BUAHAHAHAHA!!!
And I'm spent
"In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks."
-Scott Adams
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